Free Phrases

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Free phrases, opaque idioms, and fossilized words. (this is where I go when I'm at work)

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xxxtheherpfreakxxx:

I hate to do this but I really need help. I’m poor as shit and my dysphoria is getting bad and I think it might be triggering my anxiety as well. I set up a stupid gofundme page and if anyone wants to donate it would be majorly appreciated. I’m just looking to get enough to get a decent packer, a…

Signal boosting

— 3 days ago with 8 notes
chauvinistsushi:

velvetbrown:

coolyourjetsbennie:

buy these MANLY CANDLES for all your NO HOMO needs

What the hell is camouflage supposed to smell like?

insecurity

chauvinistsushi:

velvetbrown:

coolyourjetsbennie:

buy these MANLY CANDLES for all your NO HOMO needs

What the hell is camouflage supposed to smell like?

insecurity

(via ikilledcaptainclown)

— 1 week ago with 228447 notes
fishingboatproceeds:

sopheos:

the fault in our realtors

This is the John Green who owns johngreen.com. For many years, I wanted (desperately) to be the first person to come up when you searched “John Green” on google*, and John Green the Realtor was in my way. Plus, I narrowly missed the window to own johngreen.com, and I always resented John Green the Realtor.
(But really it was my fault: I told Hank in the late 90s that I didn’t want my own domain name because it was a waste of money and that I’d rather him build me a web site for my college “comedy writing” using a subdomain of his web site about Mars Exploration. “People don’t type URLs,” I told him. “They click them. So it doesn’t matter what your web site is called.” Other brilliant Internet predictions from me include, “Lonelygirl15 is definitely real,” “There will never be an Internet audience for widescreen video,” “MySpace is cooler than Facebook,” and “I don’t understand what a tumblr even is; it’s like a blog, but I already have a blog; why would I need a new blog?”)
Anyway, I know that some people on tumblr feel like I apologize too much, but I’d like to take this opportunity to apologize to John Green the Realtor, who has done a great job with johngreen.com and seems by all accounts to be an excellent choice for your real estate needs in Southwestern Tennessee and northern Mississippi. 

* I am deeply embarrassed of this ambition, but anyway this was in the days before google personalized search, when there was but one Internet for all of us.

fishingboatproceeds:

sopheos:

the fault in our realtors

This is the John Green who owns johngreen.com. For many years, I wanted (desperately) to be the first person to come up when you searched “John Green” on google*, and John Green the Realtor was in my way. Plus, I narrowly missed the window to own johngreen.com, and I always resented John Green the Realtor.

(But really it was my fault: I told Hank in the late 90s that I didn’t want my own domain name because it was a waste of money and that I’d rather him build me a web site for my college “comedy writing” using a subdomain of his web site about Mars Exploration. “People don’t type URLs,” I told him. “They click them. So it doesn’t matter what your web site is called.” Other brilliant Internet predictions from me include, “Lonelygirl15 is definitely real,” “There will never be an Internet audience for widescreen video,” “MySpace is cooler than Facebook,” and “I don’t understand what a tumblr even is; it’s like a blog, but I already have a blog; why would I need a new blog?”)

Anyway, I know that some people on tumblr feel like I apologize too much, but I’d like to take this opportunity to apologize to John Green the Realtor, who has done a great job with johngreen.com and seems by all accounts to be an excellent choice for your real estate needs in Southwestern Tennessee and northern Mississippi. 


* I am deeply embarrassed of this ambition, but anyway this was in the days before google personalized search, when there was but one Internet for all of us.

— 1 week ago with 16256 notes

Like I know I’m not bad at art but I also know I am critically lacking in technique and training and am very much an amateur and it makes reading professionally done comics rlly hard because I’m just like *weeps over their talent*

— 1 week ago
stunningpicture:

Sea foam crashes over the sand.

stunningpicture:

Sea foam crashes over the sand.

(via themanisfive)

— 1 week ago with 259 notes

freydis-frostrose:

winchesterradio:

thetiggeress:

I will never not laugh at this video

my dad’s been deployed to Afghanistan 4 times and he almost pissed himself laughing at this

My favorite vine in gif form. 

(Source: pinkmanjesse, via carrietheseawitch)

— 1 week ago with 609760 notes
To a thankfully small minority of my fellow bois & transmasculine genderfuckers →

fuckyeahsoftbutch:

(sorry, folks, I’m all about the angry text today)

If you really need to have your transmasculine identity validated by participating in some ‘bros before hoes’ femme-bashing misogynistic lad culture you are not the radical gender pioneer you are desperate for everyone to think you are.

You…

— 1 week ago with 148 notes